I’m not sure how Mums are supposed to feel on the last day of the eldest’s schooling and I’m sure it is different to the last day of your youngest’s, but I am one of those people who need to mark the day with some sort of extreme feeling, either trepidation or joy, something from down deep. But truthfully I feel maybe satisfaction, perhaps peace, but nothing to match the joy of winning the Grand Final of the Basketball! It’s like it’s the end of one chapter….. But knowing that this is just the beginning of his journey and there is so much more to come maybe makes it ok. Maybe I have already moved on and it’s like, right that’s done, dust yourself off….. next!
There is such a lot of fanfare these days for the end of grade 12. He had his formal midyear which I think is fantastic –out of the way. There is so much organized by the school that I don’t really feel I have to compete with that. When I left grade 12 – we walked out of school. That’s about it. My gang actually did spend a week at Rainbow Beach after the last day so I’m glad we had that and I have no idea who organized it, and I think there was also a dinner at the church hall, but Headmaster Toby had warned us he wanted no trouble and we were scared of him so he didn’t get it. We all did make our debuts in grade 12 too, so that was our kind of entry into the world for us.
My eldest and I have had a wonderful, difficult, anxiety ridden, teary, exceptional ride. He won’t like me for saying this but he’s a big enough character to deflect it – he had tears every first day at school into high school. He really didn’t like going a day in his life until perhaps the last few months and that was not because of the school work….
I am proud as he has put in a huge effort this year with his school work and has earned the right to rest – so maybe if he hadn’t done well I might be sad. I am proud they won the Grand Final of the Basketball in his last year for the first ever time or I might be disappointed. I am proud he is a beautiful son with a good heart and switched on to the good and bad in the world or maybe I would feel I failed him. I am proud he is a high achieving athlete and understands all the people who helped him to get there or I might not feel such pride. I am proud he is an outstanding grandson, son, brother, friend and partner or I might be disappointed he missed opportunities. And I am proud to call him my son.
So onward we go, last assembly done, exams done, Valedictory done, Tunnel of Friends done, ringing of the last school bell by each student done, a beach swim in the ocean with all the graduates from many schools done and a tear or two for what had gone before from the mums done – ah and it all turned out ok…..after all that worry.
And then….its Schoolies…..but that’s a whole nother blog … mwah xx lee
